Yesterday, in addition to this country proving it's racist and stupid, Missouri passed ballot measure to legalize sports betting and protect abortion rights.

I can't help joking in my grief so I told some pals, "Now you can lay $50 on the alt spread for the Chiefs-Raiders while driving your sidepiece to Planned Parenthood.

Dudes will be like "Damn girl! Pipe down! I'm trying to live bet so that we can afford this procedure!"