This guy was interested in her, and I didn’t think she should go with him because he was in a relationship. Plus, his girlfriend had wanted to be in an open relationship but he’d vetoed that, whilst still thinking he should be able to have sex with other women. That didn’t sit right with me. It seemed caddish.
We had an impromptu game of strip Trivial Pursuit with him once and found out he wore a thong. I liked that about him.
Sadly, the relationship didn’t work out because he said something mean about Johnny Depp and she tried to light him on fire. Which he was most offended by, as he claimed he had a phobia about being set on fire. As if everyone else is okay with being set on fire?
She said I was cruel for pointing out that the picture of the author on the cover made it look like it was a book of schemes to defeat He-Man, although she did admit that the author had since died.
Obviously I’ve chosen those examples so she still looks like the ridiculous one. What she’d really say about me was that I only hung around with pagan ladies for the nudity. She’s got a point. I mean, it wasn’t for intelligent conversation with rational people. Every time I write about a pagan friend there will be a pagan in the comments telling me they are not all like that, and it gets funnier every time. I know there are some charming, kind, sensible pagan people. Do forgive me for assuming, from my time spent among pagans, that the Venn diagram of people who believe in the healing power of herbal teas, homeopathy, the gambler’s fallacy, astrology, the world as a goddess, unicorns, a horned god of the woods…is a circle. Like if you believe one magical thing you have to believe all of them? Can’t just one magical thing be true? I mean, I once took a chance on wizards being real but I never believed in Reiki.
I’m not in touch with her now. We fell out ten years ago over something disrespectful she said about World of Warcraft.
I danced at a Five Rythms group for a year and a half before they threw me out for bringing it into disrepute. All the women I dated had hairy armpits and were angry with me for being part of the patriarchy. They only went out with me as a transition towards lesbianism. You get it!