Talking about a co-worker who put in a ticket to solve an issue that was entirely their fault:

I'm going to wait like 20 mins so I don't respond in the ticket in a way that doesn't scream, "This is wrong and you are bad for having brought it to me."

I'm still at, "It's quite obvious to me that you have dedicated your life to failing in as many ways as possible." Need to keep marinating.

Later, talking about the same person:

This is a case of the horse being at the water's edge, but dying of thirst