Dingus of the week: Burning Man

Have you ever wanted to do MDMA with a bunch of tech bros in an outdoor stewpot of mud and piss, with the vibe set by the worst electronica imaginable, and some guy named Trey is demanding to take you to the consensual Orgy Dome while a totem pole of precariously stacked vehicles looms above you? Well, get your ass to Burning Man.

Burning Man is Fyre Festival for people on ketamine.

Burning Man is like a trade show for DJs, where men who have nicknamed themselves “Lampshade” and “Cheeze” will tell you that The Matrix is a good idea, actually.

Burning Man began in 1986 and was initially conceived of as a weeklong countercultural festival in Nevada's Black Rock Desert, at a spot that Burners call the Playa, that centered art and free expression. Now, it’s basically glamping for every man who was behind the 2008 market crash and their third wives.

And injuries are so common SFGate reports that attendees can come out with piles of medical debt. And like, imagine your name is Pepper McFadden and you have to create a GoFundMe because you broke your arm falling from the top of a 70-foot-tall Labubu made from Poppi cans while high on nitrous, wearing a My Little Pony backpack and no pants.