This is my place to store everything I want to re-read or refer back to in the future.

Recent Posts

Cat is a turkey fiend

I Have Created A Turkey Fiend:

Tuesday morning she posts up, staring intensely at me, swishing the tip of her tail in frustration. She is not meowing. She is locked in. She is furious. I do not think she knows exactly what she’s mad at me for, beyond that I have previously displayed the ability to provide her with turkey, and I am not currently doing that.

Read More

Stovetop

In college, me and my roommates were looking for stuff to buy that was cheap and would be filling. We happened upon Stovetop stuffing. Once we made it, we immediately went back out and bought enough for the next 2 weeks and ate it at dinner every night. Thus began a love affair that has never abated. I’ll still crush some Stovetop!

Work, work, work

Dude, when I worked for JPMorgan, I remember reading something that chilled me to my core.

The intranet had an article that was something like “A Day in the Life of An Analyst”.

Read More

Professional painter

When I was living with my parents after law school, I was forced to help with painting a room. It was mostly me sitting there, not being able to do anything because if I wasn’t paying full attention, I’d get lectured. Eventually, we stopped painting the room actively and dad would paint a little bit after every couple of weeks or a month.

My dad was super proud of how he was able to precisely paint the edges. He’s like, “Maybe I need to do this professionally!” I told him most of his clients would expect a job to be measured in days rather than decades.

Read More

Uncle Cecil

I know of a shadowy figure known only as ‘Uncle Cecil’ through my former barber. Uncle Cecil was selling specially programmed Amazon Fire sticks that could get you access to all the legacy cable channels.

I was banned from any dealings with Uncle Cecil by my wife when I first learned of him. But perhaps it’s worth revisiting in this increasingly fractured media landscape.

Read More

Populism

This Is the Dark, Unspoken Promise of Trump’s Return:

For those bewildered by why so many Americans apparently voted against the values of liberal democracy, Balint Magyar has a useful formulation. “Liberal democracy,” he says, “offers moral constraints without problem-solving” — a lot of rules, not a lot of change — while “populism offers problem-solving without moral constraints.”

Read More

Yahoo boys

I was in the Dubai airport in 2006, and they had a kiosk with computers for travelers to use. Saw a dude with 5 Yahoo Messenger windows open, video chatting to various women. I admired his hustle and ability to juggle multiple priorities simultaneously.

Whimsy

I told a pal that I would storm her beach wedding if I wasn’t invited. She told me there was no way I’d ever do it.

I replied, “Hey, I’m a person with the 2 things needed to make this happen: disposable income and a sense of whimsy.”

Read More

Guiding the family

I had a former friend who said that he felt that the man needs to guide all the women in the family. And then I was like, “Well then who’s guiding them, cuz you ain’t a real man.”

Ballot measures

Yesterday, in addition to this country proving it’s racist and stupid, Missouri passed ballot measure to legalize sports betting and protect abortion rights.

I can’t help joking in my grief so I told some pals, “Now you can lay $50 on the alt spread for the Chiefs-Raiders while driving your sidepiece to Planned Parenthood.

Read More

Democrats are not progressive

The Democrats are a center right party. They abandoned being progressive when Jimmy Carter got smoked by Ronald Reagan in 1980. Bill Clinton put forth many policies that were conservative, like welfare reform and the amendment defining marriage as being between a man and woman. Same thing with Obama. Biden is the most progressive president we’ve had in decades.

I read a book right after the 2016 election by Thomas Frank called Listen, Liberal which opened my eyes to these facts about the Dems. Great read if you’re interested.

Read More

Awesome obit

Robert Adolph Boehm Obituary:

Robert Adolph Boehm, in accordance with his lifelong dedication to his own personal brand of decorum, muttered his last unintelligible and likely unnecessary curse on October 6, 2024, shortly before tripping backward over “some stupid mother**ing thing” and hitting his head on the floor.

Read More

Begging

Shortly after I got to the US, a bunch of kids at school said it was Halloween night and that they were so excited to get some candy. My ears perked up and I asked them for more info. They explained that they went to door to door and got free candy.

Me: So you’re begging for candy? American kid: NO! IT’S HALLOWEEN! Me: You go to each house, ask them for candy, and don’t have to pay for it? Kid: Yeah Me: That’s called begging where I’m from.

Read More

AL Central

Has the AL Central suddenly become competent? Or are all 4 teams other than Chicago being in the playoff hunt a function of the White Sox having a tireless dedication to failure?

Bad beat stories

If You Must Gamble, Gamble In Person, Like An Adult:

This seems like old-coot reasoning, but there is a fundamental difference between watching your money grow or diminish on your phone and having to make the effort to sweep it toward you or shove it away. Your entire body is part of the transaction—well, okay, maybe not your feet. That would be a move of theatrical aggressiveness that would convince the dealer to call the pit boss. And it is that full commitment of body, mind and wallet that makes gambling worthwhile…

Read More